


Martha Washington's Sex Ed (Hamilton Fanfic)

by Cats_And_Potatoes



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: "Straight" Aaron Burr, Alternate Universe - High School, Bisexual Alexander Hamilton, Bisexual Eliza Schuyler, But the students are trash, Don't Try This At Home, Eliza and John try to control Hamilton, F/F, F/M, Fuckbuddies, Gay Sex, Gen, George Washington is a Dad, Herc disappeared, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I think we know where these tags are going, James is too short for his own good, Just annoying AF, King George is not a villain, Laf is a queen, M/M, Martha is teacher goals, Multi, No joke it's 10 at night, Peggy and Maria are relationship goals, Please Kill Me, Sassy Thomas Jefferson, Sex Education, Texting, They fail at this, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, but you knew that already, not canon, online class
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-31
Updated: 2019-08-01
Packaged: 2020-07-28 02:00:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply, Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20056198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cats_And_Potatoes/pseuds/Cats_And_Potatoes
Summary: Martha is a sensible teacher.She just isn't teaching a sensible class.orMartha tries to teach but it's hard to do when your teaching teens about Sex.





	1. Introduction/Characters

Alexander/Alex Hamilton  
Male  
17  
5'6  
Dating John Laurens and Eliza/Liz Schuyler  
Punched Thomas Jefferson in the face once  
Will and can stay up for two nights straight

Eliza/Liz Schuyler  
Female  
17  
5'4  
Dating Alexander/Alex Hamilton and John Laurens  
Sisters with Angelica and Peggy Schuyler  
The responsible one

John Laurens  
Male  
18  
5'11  
Dating Alexander/Alex Hamilton and Eliza/Liz Schuyler  
Best friends with Lafayette and Hercules  
Pranks people 24/7

Thomas Jefferson  
Male  
17  
6'1  
Complicated...Dating James/Jamie Madison and Angelica Schuyler  
Tried to give food poisoning to Alexander, cousins with Lafayette  
Speaks fluent french

James/Jamie Madison  
Male  
17  
5'3  
Dating Thomas Jefferson  
Mediator when Alexander and Thomas fight  
Extremely organized

Angelica Schuyler  
Female  
18  
5'6  
Dating Thomas Jefferson  
Sisters with Eliza and Peggy  
Will kill you if you flirt with her

Peggy/Peg Schuyler  
Female  
16  
5'2  
Dating Maria/Ria Lewis  
Sisters with Angelica And Eliza Schuyler  
Skipped a grade

Maria/Ria Lewis  
Female  
17  
5'3  
Dating Peggy Schuyler  
Used to date Alexander  
Won't leave the house with out wearing red

Aaron Burr  
Male  
18  
5'8  
Crush on Angelica Schuyler  
Friends with James and Thomas  
The Mature One

Gilbert du Motier Marquis de Lafayette/Laf  
Genderfluid  
17  
6'1  
Single  
Best friends with Laurens, Alexander, and Hercules  
Has more style than anyone else

Charles Lee  
Male  
17  
5'7  
Dating Samuel Seabury  
Hates George Washington  
The annoying one

Samuel Seabury  
Male  
18  
5'10  
Dating Charles Lee/Might have slight crush on George III  
Is plotting Alexander's demise  
Really kind everyone hates him

(King) George III  
Male  
17  
6'0  
Loves himself and is too busy for other relationships  
Thinks he is the best thing since sliced bread  
Claims he is royalty, this is yet to be determined

Hercules/Herc Mulligan  
Male  
18  
5'11  
Single  
Is traveling the world  
Left America when he was 15


	2. First Day

8:00 AM  
Maria L. has joined the class  
Angelica S. has joined the class  
8:01 AM  
James M. has joined the class  
8:03 AM  
George III has joined the class  
Charles L. has joined the class  
8:06 AM  
Eliza S. has joined the class  
John L. has joined the class  
8:10  
Samuel S. has joined the class  
8:17  
Peggy S. has joined the class  
Gilbert du Motier Marquis de Lafayette has joined the class

Peggy S. : God laf did you name yourself so you would always be a showoff????

Gilbert du Motier Marquis de Lafayette: Nah, I was just born to be fabulous

Eliza S.: Shhh! The teacher could join any minute!

Peggy S.: C'mon Liz, the online class was supposed to start at 8:15 maybe she won't arrive at all

James M.: That's doubtful.

John L.: Speaking of missing people has anyone seen Alex?

Samuel S.: No, and that's probably for the better.

John L.: Shut up Samuel Shitbury

Eliza S.: JOHN! Your going to get kicked out of class on the first day!

Angelica S.: Seems like Alexander and Thomas will be kicked out with him. The class syllabus said those who are late are not tolerated.

Maria L.: A syllabus written by a teacher who is late herself

Peggy S.: true dat

8:21 AM  
Alexander H. has joined the class  
Thomas J. has joined the class

Thomas J.: Alex is such a fucking bitch.

Eliza S.:DO YOU HAVE A DESIRE TO GET EXPELLED?

Alexander H.: Quiet Eliza, I'll handle this fucker.

Alexander H.: Thomas Jefferson. You are southern piece of shit who is literally the scum of the earth and deserve to die a slow miserable death. I hope to be watching when you die. I might even bring some popcorn so the occasion will be more enjoyable

James M.:Jesus Christ

8:25: Mrs. Washington has joined the class.

Mrs. Washington: What happened here?


	3. Teaching is hell (Staring anti-gay Martha Washington)

Mrs. Washington: Why are you swearing in class?

John L.: Because Alex was being threatened.

Thomas J.: Because I was telling the truth.

Alexander H.: Because Thomas is a disgusting piece of shit.

Eliza S.: ALEX!!!!!

Mrs. Washington: John, Thomas, and Alexander. You two will be staying online after class to talk to me. In the meantime, we must begin class.

Maria L.: I think we all know how to have sex already miss.

Charles L.: Especially you Maria 

Peggy S.: BITCH WANNA GO?

Mrs. Washington: SILENCE. Or I will mute all of you.

Mrs. Washington: Well, Maria did have a point. I would think by your age you would all know how to have sex with another person. In fact, say I if you have had sex before.

Alexander H.: I

Thomas J.: I

Charles L.: I

Angelica S.: I

John L.: I 

Gilbert du Motier Marquis de Lafayette: I

Eliza S.: I

Samuel S.: I

Maria S.: I

Thomas J.: -cough-

James M.: I

Mrs. Washington: Peggy Schuyler? 

Peggy S.: Oh, sorry I went to get some coffee, what's happening?

Mrs. Washington: Have you had sexual intercourse with a man?

Peggy S.: Nope

Mrs. Washington: So your the only virgin here?

Peggy S.: Nope

Mrs. Washington: Wait... you're gay?

Peggy S.: Pan actually but close enough

Mrs. Washington: Who here has had STRAIGHT sex?

Thomas J.: Me

James M.: What?

Thomas J.: LATER

Alexander H: I

Maria L.: I

Angelica S.: I

James M.: WhAt

Eliza S.: I

John L.: I

Mrs. Washington: Okay good.

Alexander H.: Is it a problem that I'm dating two people?

Mrs. Washington has left the class


End file.
